It’s not easy to be creative when you are under a lot of stress, especially the uniquely complex stress connected with this virus. I sure know that.
Our natural tendency is to worry about our health or the health of our loved ones. We worry about our jobs. We worry about the immediacies of food and home and long term destruction that we can’t even predict yet. Worry, however, is destructive. It has been too present for me lately, although really hard to identify.
I have been taking my energy over the last 3 weeks and trying to channel it toward my job in this new ‘work from home’ environment. I try to think about how I can reorganize my work flow within the new parameters and somehow balance the Home Office and the home. I keep trying to keep everything smooth and reach the same high standard that I always have, but now realize that everything needs to be allowed to shift and find the new standard.
Gratefully, there comes a point when you finally start realizing that zombies are not storming the doors, Spring is starting to bloom in the yard, the days are getting warmer, and you’re doing well at your job. It’s different, but good. You wake up one morning and realize you’re getting sleep and you’re eating fine and it’s gonna be OK. I’m grateful right now that my husband and I know how to be pretty self sufficient and are really having no trouble distancing ourselves.
As I have begun to relax I realized that I have completely neglected that creative part of me that needs nourishment too. Today I sat down at the easel and flipped through my vacation photos from our trip out West last spring, right after graduation. When you still work full time vacations are often just done at a dead run, zooming too fast through places that are awesome and gorgeous. You don’t have time to sit there and paint for a long period of time so you take lots of photos with intent to bring them back to the studio and make the paintings later. Unfortunately, I actually don’t do that as often as I should. Now as I find that balance – the true life balance – I know I need to begin to paint plein aire from these photos from trips. This morning’s offering is a lovely rock outcropping from Yellowstone.
It feels good to paint again and spend some time seeking my peace.